Day of reckoning

This is the point in my novel where I decide it's not working and it's too stupid and boring to continue with, and either I move on or I give up. I recognize this point. Last year I gave up with fewer words than I have now, and I'm trying not to give up my momentum this time.

But I'm still so unconvinced this is working. The mood is too monotone--how do you write about people feeling numb, without it sounding dull and numbing? Though I did come up with one possible helpful angle on this novel today. I meant it to be about a very close-knit group of friends in which one person dies, but I was having trouble understanding the main character Jessie's relationships to the other people in the group, if she's really known them so long and so well. They didn't seem to be interacting right. Finally, it occurred to me maybe she doesn't know all of them that well. Maybe she's only been on the outskirts of this group, and she's only pulled in further now because of her link to the guy who died. I hesitate to write it that way for various reasons, but I'm playing with that idea.

Anyway, I think this is the make it or break it point for me and this year's NaNoWriMo, especially since I'm very busy the rest of the week, and would have to go way out of my way to find time to write later this week. So here's hoping I can plow through and write at least 1,017 more words tonight (what I need to make my quota)...or else!